Time to Plant Those Easter Baskets

So far I've managed to ignore numerous clues that Easter Sunday is less than two weeks away, such as: Mentioning it in my previous post; the hyacinths poking up on the western side of the house looking like they regret it; and finally the moon, which is waxing on schedule to a full on Good Friday while impressing nearby Venus and Jupiter. Called the Pink Moon by eastern native Americans after the early flowering of pink phlox, this April moon will be the first full moon since the first day of spring. Hence, Easter on April 8.

Last weekend I finally gathered up all of our winter/overlooked Christmas decorations and threw them in the basement. The house looks a lot less cluttered (if you don't count the basement) so I may forgo the Easter accessories and focus entirely on family Easter baskets to add some color to the space.

In our household, plastic Easter grass has been banned for the last 20 years. We've moved three times in that period, so I don't know why I'm still finding it -- often lurking with the dead Christmas tree needles. ... Really, the stuff is indestructible. No vacuum cleaner I have ever owned will go anywhere near it. They all pucker up and spit it out ....

Consequently, we grow our own Easter grass. I buy some fast-sprouting seed and soil, put them in lined baskets covered with plastic wrap, and set them by a sunny window. On Easter morning I tuck in some pansies and whatever other annual I can find in the stores, a few wrapped eggs and bunnies, plus maybe a gift card or an Andrew Jackson. Voila! Any grass or soil that gets spilled is indistinguishable from other household dirt, which even my surly Bissell will digest. Then after the holiday, the annuals can be planted and the grass can be used to patch holes in the yard.

Thinking about these home-made Easter baskets with their home-grown, no-doubt-environmentally-correct bed of Easter grass with its rosy recycling future gives me a pleasant feeling of self-righteousness that is as much fun to savor as a solid dark Godiva rabbit. Ok, almost as much fun .....

Personally, I think there are too many holidays with an emphasis on candy. St. Valentine's Day, Easter, Halloween. Sure, all holidays are occasions to overeat, but this isn't exactly helping a fat, broke populace. I can't seem to go into our local candy mansion without dropping 30 bucks and gaining 5 pounds. That works out to $6 per pound  ....

Ah, but the part in between is so sublime. It was years before my kids realized chocolate Easter bunnies actually had ears instead of stumps with teeth marks .... Good thing a little chocolate is healthy for you (as if I ever had any doubt). The best strategy for me is to limit myself to a single daily portion, like Lindors by Lindt or Dove Promises or Hershey minis or kisses (none of which are compensating me for this recommendation, Ok?). Then no matter how extraordinarily great it tastes, I know I can have another one tomorrow. And the day after, and the day after that .....


Gotta go buy some dirt. And grass seed. And chocolate bunnies. With big, long ears ......








***Pink Moon reference from farmersalmanac.com











Pass it along and remember, It's all (c)opyrighted(c)2012(c)(c)

Mad Marchness

Look, I know this pic is muddy,
 but isn't that appropriate?

I like March. Look, you may not think it belongs with the In Crowd of Months, like December or the summer months. But it has a lot going for it from my perspective.

March gets its name from the Roman Martius, for Mars. It's the only month that is a common noun and also a verb (Ok, May is a verb, but it's an auxiliary one so it only gets partial credit). As a noun, it's a way of walking and also a form of lively military-style music composed by John Philip Sousa, who no doubt counted it as his favorite month too (in 4/4 time). As a verb, it is what you tell your kid when he has to take a time out.

It contains the Ides of March. Ok, each month has an ides, but not with a capital letter and a warning attached. We don't fear the ides of other months, right? (Ok, maybe April). ... Also permanently parked in March are St. Patrick's Day, the vernal equinox, my birthday and Daylight Savings Time. Sometimes Easter, too (but not in 2012, when it misses the month by eight days). It is also Women's History Month, and includes Pi Day (3/14), Saint Joseph's Day (March 18), and even Self-Injury Awareness Day (March 1).

My favorite is the vernal equinox. In many regions Spring signals the beginning of Mud Season, but not here. Here in suburban Massachusetts I call it Sand Season, when several hundred cubic yards of the silica quartz particles are tracked into the house from winter roads. This is usually the closest I will get to the beach for several more months so I try to enjoy it ....

March ushers in Daylight Savings Time, plus the amount of daylight begins to accelerate. This is important for mammals like me who retreat into semi-hibernation during the dark, cold months. Daylight is to Me as Oil is to The Tin Man, Ok? It's like a soft snowfall to a sleepy Dorothy. It's like a tiny mouse to a cowardly lion.

Yes, I really enjoyed 'Wicked' on Broadway, which I saw on March 10 .....

...  For college students March means spring break, that ages-old tradition where everyone plays beer pong and does jello shots while trying to refrain from embarrassing behavior that will immediately be photographed, posted on Facebook and googled by prospective employers, thereby forever ruining any chance for a career even before graduation.

 -- And also March Madness basketball. Look, if college basketball isn't on your radar then you don't live in a houseful of males with ties to Dear Old Fuck U. I think it's called March Madness because everyone gets mad when their brackets are shredded to bits by some unlikely Cinderella team and they are out 50 bucks to the office pool.

Finally, March is one of seven months with 31 days. Add criteria of season and time changes, holiday, famous Shakespeare quote plus two college hoops tournaments and you can see how March, named after the god of war (cue the Holst score), emerges victorious as the Month of the Year.

So kick off those sandy/muddy shoes, grab the remote, and down a jello shot. I'm sure you'll be agreeing with me in no time.

March Rules!




... Here's a YouTube link to Sousa's 'Stars and Stripes Forever,' guaranteed to get the mud (or sand) out of your veins if not your shoes:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cx0RRdPdKcM


Here's another link to Gustav Holst's 'Mars' piece from 'The Planets.'


www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8EwBTQhl3Y


Also, since we're on the subject of Mars, check out the red planet this month in the eastern sky. For a piece of rock, it's got great timing (3/3, no doubt .....)













Pass it along and remember, It's all (c)opyrighted(c)2012(c)(c)

Digging Another Canal

Possibly the last photo ever of Tooth No. 18, the lower back molar.
I am fond of No. 18 -- treated it like royalty as it has a crown
 (even though it came without a kingdom).

So the good news is, I need a root canal. Again. Same tooth. I guess you could call it a re-root canal. I'm not exactly sure how this works but am conjuring up images of the Panama Canal being built from 1880-1914. I sure hope my work doesn't take that long ....

The bad news is, I could lose my lower left molar if the re-root canal isn't successful. That means an implant, with lots of visits to new dentists on streets without signs and requests for insurance cards that have been lost for the last 11-1/2 months.

And a big dig in the back of my mouth. I'm not exactly sure how this works, but am conjuring up images of The Big Dig in Boston which lasted from 1991 to 2007, went way over budget, and included a tunnel and bridge. My mouth is way smaller than downtown Boston, but it still gets a lot of traffic ....

It's true I've had a root canal before and survived, but I'm just not looking forward to it. I remember my mouth feeling like a mining site gearing back up after blasting, strip-mining, an earthquake and flooding.

****

[Some time later]


So I've survived this procedure, which is called a root canal re-treatment. Maybe you are already familiar with it. The doctor worked quite fast but this is one stubborn tooth evidently so it took an hour. My mouth was open so long I began to feel sorry for that snake creature in the asteroid from 'The Empire Strikes Back' that the Millennium Falcon thought was a cave. Next visit Ima ask for some support beams ....

This re-treatment truly is a scary procedure because they put the tooth in a metal cage surrounded by a trampoline which covers my mouth opening. It reminds me of some mini-setup for extreme wrestling. But the part that disturbs me most is when the surgeon calls for The Explorer Tool.

Ok, I have never actually seen The Explorer Tool but it still strikes terror in my brain because I am aware that all kinds of disasters can befall in the name of exploration. Remember Magellan? Cortez? .... Also, The Explorer is followed by a series of Drillers -- they look like miniature corkscrews connected to a drill. I am afraid all the talk about drilling and exploring will lead to political candidates pestering me for a donation.


Mom, did you ever tell me my imagination was running wild??
 

Finally, the follow-up visit revealed the tooth may be fractured after all. The idea is to see if there's still infection in a month.

Until then, I am going to treat this tooth kindly, forsaking Laffy Taffy and other potential irritants.


*******

[One month later]

Well I've been steeling myself for bad news, which is I will be losing tooth No. 18. I need to make an appointment. Maybe in two weeks. I need more time for good-byes. The Tooth Fairy's probably backed up anyway ......














Pass it along and remember, It's all (c)opyrighted(c)2012(c)(c)