Today I reluctantly exchange my Comedy mask for a Tragedy one.
As a Penn State alumna, I am heartsick over the events unfolding this past week.
To recap, former longtime Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky was indicted Nov. 5 on 40 charges of child molestation that spanned over a decade. Two university officials were also charged with failure to report abuse which took place on campus. The university's coach, Joe Paterno, who reported one of the incidents based on a grad assistant's eyewitness account, faces criticism for not doing more to safeguard the victim.
In America, of course, you are innocent until proven guilty. However, the propensity of evidence leads to assumptions of guilt.
That's why I feel ashamed that the heads of my alma mater and its football team which I love and follow could appear to be so criminally or ethically negligent.
... Back in junior high, I had a rep in some circles as 'the girl who knows football' (actually, there were two of us). Lord'a'mercy, I was hooked the first time I saw O.J. Simpson rush for a USC first down. (Ironic, huh?) ... I have had the pleasure of watching male jaws drop as I supply a name or statistic from last year's mid-season pro game. Noooosssir, you didn't try to impress some chick with your football acumen when I was around ....
I went to many PSU home games, singing, 'We don't know the goddamn words' with the rest of the student section as the band played 'The Penn State Alma Mater.' In fact, Sandusky was my hero. After watching season after season of countless yardage-losing off-tackle plays, throwing only on 3rd-and-long, and gutless field goal attempts on 4th-and-inches -- there was a time when I hoped Paterno would step down so Sandusky could take over.
So when a beloved sport, school, coaches and college town are splattered with mud, I feel as though some has splashed on me as well. We are Penn State?? Linebacker U. or Linebugger U.? The Lion was Lyin'? Personal Foul? Encroachment? Off sides?
It's troubling that no one at the university seemed to think things through. Questions abound: Did they believe the Sandusky problem was simply going to disappear? Did it never occur to them that any cover-up was going to have far worse ramifications than the original sex scandal? Did they accept the inevitable subsequent victims as collateral damage for maintaining the status quo? Did they realize the price they and others would pay for silence? Were they aware that following the old adage that the first priority of any institution is self-perpetuation was what mired the Catholic Church in a sex scandal? Did they ever read anything other than the sports pages?
Why did the investigation of Sandusky drag on for three years? How many victims do you need before making an arrest? What really happened to DA Ray Gricar in 2005? Why does there appear to be no effective crisis management team at Old Main?
If you were a grad student and walked into a rape in progress involving your iconic former coach, what would you have done? Are we all so very certain the child's welfare would be uppermost in our reeling mind?
Since I'm not a young grad assistant in a big college football program, I can't say what I would have done. However, as a parent, if I had walked into a parallel situation -- say, involving a teacher at a school -- I flatter myself thinking I could predict my actions: If I hadn't been seen, I would have hightailed it to the safest place I could find, like a distant Ladies Room or my car. Then I would have repeated Ohmigod what should I do? over and over to myself. Then it would dawn on me that somehow I would have to make sure the kid was all right. Although it would be the last thing I would want to do, I would feel compelled, because I'm a mom, to force myself to go back to check on that child. I might fear for my own life and search for some weapon first. I might totally chicken out and call the police, drive away, and then watch from a distance for police cars. Or ... I might not .....
I can't predict what I would be able to articulate to a 911 dispatcher with my heart pounding and emotions flooding my brain. Ideally (if I had the presence of mind), I'd report a rape in progress and give the location before hanging up. What I would not want to do is specify a VIP was involved. Then I would call my husband and maybe my lawyer. ... Or, would I call my husband first, before calling the police? Ohmigod ohmigod, what should I do? what should I do?
So I am in no position to judge other people. Yet, if in such a circumstance I turn to the most powerful people in town and nothing seems to change -- then either those people have too much power or their priorities are skewed.
Paterno and his wife have given their hearts, their lives, to the university. Paterno has grown PSU and its football program into well-regarded institutions. Too much has changed for either one to shrink to pre-Paterno size. I predict Sandusky's suicide, but PSU football will survive. It has too many fans like me ....
Ethics issues have a way of appearing unexpectedly in some peripheral area of our lives. We could all doubtless benefit from more preparation for dealing with that.
Jettison Joe? His legacy will remain largely intact -- as it should. Compensate the victims as best as possible. Fire people. Start fresh, with some outsiders. Also, let us all learn from false idolatry a little about ourselves and our beloved institutions and hopefully calibrate our own moral compasses. I can't think of much else that can be salvaged from this mess.
Meanwhile, it's time for me to finally learn the words to the old alma mater -- especially the final verse:
... 'May no act of ours bring shame,
To one heart that loves thy name;
May our lives help swell thy fame,
Dear old State, dear old State.'
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Sources for this post include The New York Times (nytimes.com), AP and Reuters wire reports, the Patriot-News (pennlive.com), and The Daily Collegian (collegian.psu.edu).
'Alma Mater' by F.L. Pattee and C.C Converse (c)1919 Paxwin Corporation
Pass it along and remember, It's all (c)opyrighted(c)2011(c)(c)
